Truly I Do
by DorieKay
Summary: Five years after "Chosen". Buffy is sent to New Orleans to watch over a Hellmouth. She goes to a masquerade ball and finds something unexpected. Guess what it is. Spuffy.


Title: Truly I Do

Summary: Five years after "Chosen". Buffy is sent to New Orleans to watch over a Hellmouth. She goes to a masquerade ball and finds something unexpected. Guess what it is. Spuffy.

A/N: this is my first story ever. I love Spike and Buffy together. I know I can't really write that well but I wanted to put this story out there just to get feedback and see what you think.

Buffy sat on her bed looking at the ceiling. Deciding that the water stains resembled Kevin Bacon she got up and walked to the bathroom.

When she saw herself in the mirror, she wondered why on Earth would anyone want to invite her to a Masquerade ball. She looked nothing like her former self as she had jet black hair and blue contacts. It was not her choice, though. Giles made her move to New Orleans to watch over a Hellmouth - how they could fit one there was beyond her - and had her change her identity for 'safety precautions'. He even made her change her name to Belinda Calloway. Use that name once and it's stuck with you. Why anyone would want to be interested in the ex one and only Chosen she didn't know. That was Giles for you, though.

RingRingRing

"Hello?'' Buffy answered the phone.

''Hey Linda. It's me Marie," the woman on the phone said.

"Oh hey I was just about to take a bath and get ready," she answered.

"Ok, well you'd better hurry up. I'll be there in two hours to pick you up, if that's all right?"

"No, no that's fine. I'll be ready. See you in a few." The girls hung up and Buffy walked back to the bathroom and ran some hot water for her bath.

As she slid in the water, Buffy began to think. She had been doing that alot lately seeing as she had nothing else to do. She began thinking of everything from her mom's death to nights with Spike....Spike. He was the one thing that made since in her crazy life. He was always there, ready for a good fight. After everything she did to him, he continued to love her. That's what she loved most about their 'relationship'. All they did was fight. But it made her feel better to have someone to argue with than her being the leader and having everyone agree to what she said. He treated her as an equal and never held back.

Buffy knew since went to rescue him from Wood. She couldn't stop imagining what her life would be like without him. All she could think of was getting there and saving him, even if it meant killing Wood. She knew most of the girls and her friends thought she was whipped, that all she could think about was him. That was partly true. But like she had told them, Spike was their strongest worrier and they needed him. Plus she needed him to be strong for her.

But now he was gone and she couldn't bring him back. Buffy missed him so much she wondered how she even went on with this thing called living. How could it be called living if half your heart is missing? Why did he stay and die? She told him she loved him. Why didn't he belive her? Did he think she was taking pity on him? Just to give him satisfaction for once and die happy? But he didn't believe her. Didn't he know her life wouldn't be a life without him? Stupid pompus idiot. He always had to get his way. No matter what the cost. He had wanted to see how it ended and that's what he got.

Spike saved the world but why did Buffy feel as if it were her fault? Like somehow she could have prevented it. But she knew in her heart she couldn't have persuaded him to leave. Like always, he got his way.

After soaping up and washing her hair, Buffy got out and started getting ready for the ball. She curled her hair in a bun and left her curled bangs down with a few stands of curled hair hanging down. She put on costume make-up using light blue and white sparkly eye-shadow.

Buffy walked in her towel to her closet and looked at the gorgeous dress hanging there. It had taken her and Marie a whole week to find it. The dress looked amazing on her. Buffy couldn't beleive how hard it was to find a dress for a ball. Apparently it was a big deal in south Louisiana.

That's another thing she learned. Things she didn't know or cared about were big things in Louisiana.

Buffy realized as she was looking at the dress, it looked like the one she wore on Halloween when Ethan Rayne turned everyone into their costumes. Except this dress was white with glitter and pearls. The shoes she found looked almost like the ones Drew Barrymore wore in 'Ever After'. As she was looking at it Buffy noticed the dress was exactly what she wanted for a wedding dress. She'd always wanted a small fairy tale-like wedding. How on earth had she missed that she didn't know. Maybe subconsciously she picked it out hoping somehow for a wedding with Spike. Like that'll ever happen she thought.

She took it out of the closet and off the hanger. When she put it on it was like she wasn't Buffy anymore. Well technically she wasn't seeing as all the cosmetic changes. She was sure no one would ever recognize her.

By now it was seven forty-five and Marie would be there in fifteen minutes. Buffy found her mask. It wasn't the kind where you held up with a stick. You strapped it around your head. The mask was white, like her dress, and had glitter on it. It was small to where it just covered her eyes and some of her nose.

As Buffy was putting on her long pearl necklace, she heard a honking noise from outside. She walked to the window and saw a white limo with a woman in a blue sticking out of the top.

"Your chariot awaits you my lady," Marie screamed to Buffy.

"I will be right down my gentle woman," Buffy called back. Man how she loved to be stupid and how she missed it. Ever since the final battle Buffy had never really had a real genuine smile. She was glad for this opportunity to let loose and have a good time.

After making it downstairs, trying not to dirty her dress, Buffy slid into the limo.

"Wow you look amazing," Marie said after Buffy got herself situated.

"Thanks. it tooe me nearly two hours to get ready. Who knew it took so long to get ready?"

"Well these things are pretty big around here. But no one ever really hears about them unless you're in the parade club or know someone who is."

"Yeah. Little old me from California not knowing a thing about parades and Southern tradition," Buffy said.

"Yeah, most people feel left out but, don't worry you'll fit in fine," Marie told her looking happy. When they arrived it was like nothing Buffy had ever seen before. It looked as if everything was from a fairy tale. Women and men of all different shapes and sizes in different colors and styles of dresses and suits.

"It's amazing," Buffy whispered to no one but herself. Marie took her and introduced her to her friends and Buffy found them quite boring. All they would talk about was something about baseball.

After a while she found herself looking around at people. They all seemed to be happy and have their life in order, unlike her. A part of her was happy for them, at least they had something or someone. The other part of her, however, wanted to gouge their eyes out. 'Stupid happy people' she thought. As she was looking around, though, she saw a highly attractive (what she could see of him) man with black hair with matching black suit. For some odd reason he was staring at her. Buffy looked away hoping she didn't seem to obvious.

For the rest of the night every time she looked in his direction, Buffy saw that he would be looking at her. This tended to freak her out a little, but she found it oddly comforting. She didn't know why though. But by the end of the night it was getting on her nerves. She decided to pay him a little visit. Buffy planned how she would do it. She would just look like she was going get some punch.

When Buffy got to the table where the gentlemen and the punch were, she got her punch and stood there looking straight ahead for a few minutes. Then, she turned and faced him.

"Hi," she said, "I was just wondering why you kept looking at me and if you weren't I'm so sorry. It just seemed that way and I am so stupid so I'll just shut up now."

"Calm down, luv. It's ok. I did keep looking at you. I'm sorry if I freaked you out. I didn't mean to." Buffy just looked at him blankly. That voice. That voice. It's Spi...... No it couldn't possibly be him. He's dead. Dead, dead, dead. No way. There is a big crater to prove it. And a whole lot of sunlight as well.

"Excuse me miss......miss. Are you paying attention. I said I was looking for a model for my magazine and I thought you would make a nice candidate," The man hesitated to say. 'God she sounds and seems so much like Buffy. But that's impossible. Giles told me she was in still in Europe. Why would she be here with black hair anyway?'

"I'm sorry. You just seem like someone I used to know," Buffy said embarrassed, "I'm sorry but I can't be a model. I've been very busy lately."

"That's all right. I just thought you would be pretty without that mask on."

"Well that's what I'm told. but I can't take it off until midnight when there is the unmasking. Or so I'm told."

"Yeah. I'm told that too." 'All right I'm gonna go for it. Whether I get my heart stomped on or not, I need to know if it's her.' But before he could say anything Buffy told him she had to go and check on her friends.

"Ok, I'll see you later then." But Buffy had to intention on going see Marie. Instead, she went to the bathroom. She locked herself in a stall and started to cry. That couldn't have been him. There is no way. Why did she always have to have that little glimmer of hope? She had to face reality. Spike was gone and he wasn't coming back no matter how much hope she had.

After drying her eyes, Buffy left and went to really find Marie.

"Oh hi Linda. I was wondering where you went. Anyway, this really cute guy came and asked for you. He told me to give you this message 'Can we rest now, Buffy, can we rest?', I'm hoping you know what that means." But Buffy was to excited to hear what Marie said next, which was where and when to meet him- the park at midnight.

'He's alive. He's alive. Spike-alive! That stupid pompous idiot is alive!' was all she could think. She ran out of the hall not bothering to answer Marie's question about whether she was all right. All Buffy could think of was finding him, but where? She hadn't heard what Marie had said about meeting some where at sometime. Her mind was spinning. Was it really him? How did he know it was her? Did he still love her? As she was thinking all of this and running full speed, Buffy ran straight into a pole. After trying to sit up several times, Buffy decided to give up and put her head back on the concrete.

A while later she heard footsteps. Buffy turned her head and looked up.

It was him.

"Now Buffy, we know better than to go and run into to walls, don't we luv?" He bent down and picked her up.

"Spike?" She asked him uncertainly.

"Yes it's me pet," he replied while standing her up on her feet.

"But how? How could this happen? You died. You stupid person. You stayed even after I told you I loved you-" But he cut her off.

"What was that?"

"What was what? Spike you're scaring me," She replied.

"Say what you said again."

"Say wha- oh. I love you, Spike," Buffy told him with tears in her eyes.

"I love you too."

"Now tell me how you got here.

"I don't know how I got this way. All I remember is you and me telling you that you didn't love me and thanks for saying it and then darkness. I can't remember how long I was in the darkness. But then I remember a light and the light told me I was given a second chance because I saved the world. The next thing I know I'm in Europe in a field in the hot sun. Buffy, I'm human. I didn't know who I was and I just wandered around for four years trying to find out who I was. Then it just hit me- you, the first, my soul- it all came flooding back." But Buffy didn't say anything thing. She just stood there with her mouth opening and closing like a fish. Then she hugged him.

"Um...Slayer.....breaking ribs….. Human now," Spike managed to choke out.

"Oh, right. Sorry. It's just all so new," she said. Then Buffy did something that neither of them expected - she punched Spike.

"OW!! What the bloody hell was that for?"

"For not coming and finding me sooner!" Spike just looked at her. God how he missed those punches. But not so much now because he was human.

"Buffy, luv, I tried to find you, truly I did. I called Giles just a few months ago and he said you were staying in Europe permanently and that you didn't want to see me. Of course I didn't believe it not matter how much I knew you hated or loved me. So I found where everyone was and went there ready to hurt people if they didn't give me straight answers. But when I got there, you weren't there. Lucky for Dawn though. She was the only one of the lot I knew who wanted to talk to me. She told me you were here. So I came to find you, and here we are now."

"Oh Spike....My William..... I've missed you so much," Buffy told him as she put her hand on his cheek and leaning in for a kiss. This wasn't a kiss of lust or hunger or need. No, this was a kiss of love, love so deep the they just wanted to drown in it, in each other.

After they broke apart, Buffy and Spike just looked into each other's eyes, savoring the moment. "Well, where to now Buffy?" Spike asked her wanting to break the silence.

"I have an apartment. It's not much, but it's home."

"I'm sure whatever you have will be just fine, just as long as I don't loose you again." He held out his hand and Buffy put hers in his and they began walking.

"Spike."

"Yes, luv."

"Loose the hair."


End file.
